


Salamander Eyes

by Its_real_for_us



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Confessions, F/M, Fluff, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-03
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-04-07 10:41:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19083385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Its_real_for_us/pseuds/Its_real_for_us
Summary: "T-Tina?" Newt's voice was shaky, uncertain of its next move. "How do you always know exactly what I mean?" He regretted the words the moment they crossed his parted lips.





	Salamander Eyes

Newt slowly closed his eyes, trying to imagine the sound of anything but Leta's voice.

_"I love you." "I love you." "I love you."_

He tried to find a way to be stronger than his thoughts, but he could not. Her voice was a drum to a beat he never asked to listen to. It called for him in the depths of night, in the back of his jumbled mind. He did not love her. Time had changed him. Indeed, he cared for her, but not in the way a man loved a woman, in the way a friend loved a friend. Their memories flooded back to him in waves, never a constant flow of energy, always broken up pieces to a heart becoming undone.

Newt licked his lips as he ran his fingertips through his champagne locks. The mourning of a first love, a confidant, he did not know how to feel. He was not used to these strange emotions, or sentiments of any sort. The tug of his heart was estranged to him. It felt like a stronger version of Pickett's grip, begging for attention, begging for an outpour of feelings he was unwilling, or unsure how to show.

Sweat rolled down Newt's cheekbones, kissing his freckles in their passing. His heart rate was unsteady, more rapid than his Niffler's after a long treacherous run. It scared him. The Hufflepuff wizard quickly got up, touching the palms of his hands to his chest. Thump. Thump. Thump. The air to his lungs was in overdrive. He perched himself on the side of the bed, swaying his feet sideways as they landed on the floor. Thump. The sound was now becoming the norm. Thousands of thoughts filled his brain to the rim. Newt looked sideway as he got up, not making eye contact with the mirror, too scared to face any reality. The truth being Leta's death, Queenie's departure, or the millions of other things he kept locked away.

_Leta. Queenie. Tina. Credence. Grindelwald. Theseus. Jacob._

He could not find a way to quiet his thoughts. He slowly let one of his pale, nimble fingers graze his pocket, searching for the green stem-like legs he was so used to. The pads of his fingers came up with nothing, but the threaded pit of an empty poche. His heart began to beat even more restlessly. Thump. Thump.

A sudden, but incredibly light, pressure brushed his shoulders. Newt's eyes aligned with Pickett's incredibly dark ones, holding them just a moment, however, much longer than any humans. He felt like he could trust animals, but his shyness still did not completely cease with them. An extremely faint half-frown, half-smile painted its way to the handsome man's visage. At least, his favourite bowtruckle was safe and exactly where he was supposed to be. He knew he could not say the same for his fellow brother crying over Leta, Jacob in the other room almost ill of Queenie, and Tina, oh Tina, his heart breaking a little at the thought, stuck in between it all.

He began to drift into the memory of her smile, thinking of little quirks he had seen of hers over time. A scarlet hue played at his constellation cheeks, his head tilting for a moment as he looked back down at his palms. Something about them felt different; he was reminded of the end of Tina's hair the day he had left her side in New York.

Newt approached his door, turning it slowly. He let one eye peak through the small crack first, sure everyone was in their own confined spaces, he tiptoed awkwardly to the kitchen, not realising Tina's overwhelming presence.

"You can't sleep?" Tina asked, worry brimming her, already cloudy from sadness, voice. Newt halted in his walk, titling his head, not keeping even the slimmest sign of eye contact. His breaths caught in his throat before every word he was about to say. Though, even if he could get past the lack of oxygen to his lungs, he would not be able to get through his maze-like pathways of thoughts- the ones that could never know exactly what to say.

"Newt-" Tina's voice was fragile but rugged. It was between love and heartache.

"I-It, umm, doesn't seem right," he said, thinking again about his mourning brother. _,_ Her name was still overpowering, but looking at Tina, in that moment, Newt forgot everything that had ever hurt him. Thump. Thump. Thump. The sound was back, the thumping of his heart, though, this was even more estranged to him. He had felt it once, in a farewell, a late day, his first time in America. The sound of his heart clenching drastically, an ache that was good. He never thought pain could be pleasant. He could remember the lingering of his feet before he boarded to known lands, but the wish of wanting to stay in uncharted territories, in undiscovered places, or people, or possibly even known witches that he still wanted to know more, somehow, some way. He could not understand it, but there was something about Tina that arose within the deepest parts of his odd soul, a flame that was so bright, so strong, it would never exstingish. He did not know what it meant. Nevertheless, he knew it was good, it was pure; it was her.

"It doesn't for me either," Tina said as she pressed her fingers harshly against her tea cup, needing to feel the heat's sensation, its comfort. "I-I conjured a potion to put Jacob to sleep," Tina said after long moments of silence. "He asked me, but--"

"I-It still didn't feel completely right." Newt's eyes peered up from his fringe momentarily, but they simultaneously looked straight back down after looking into Tina's big droopy eyes.

"Queenie-- she's driving him ill." They both looked away. Tina's orbs watering at the corners, Newt afraid to glance, afraid to feel, afraid of everything. "S-She's driving me sleepless, too." Tina's voice was full of angst. Newt diverted his gaze to her regard, seeing the lone tear stream down her cheek. Part of him, wanted to pounce like an animal, protect her at all costs, but he could not. A dagger pierced deeply thorough his heart. T-Tina was crying. There was no sight in the world more heart-wrenching. It was a moment, out of many, but the strongest one yet, that Newt wished there was some Gryffindor in him- some courage. He looked at the palms of his hands, stroking his thump across the hardened surface on the backside of his knuckles as he changed subjects.

"I-I couldn't help T-Theseus, I tried, but it felt wrong to be there when he mourns," Newt said as Tina did anything to capture his shy regard, to let him feel somewhat more open. Though, the Hufflepuff remained with eyes glued to the floorboards, searching for some willpower amongst them, questioning his own inhability to converse.

"We aren't the only ones allowed to mourn." Tina's tone had changed. There was a realness in it, a sense of true care.

"L-Leta," the name returning to his brain for a moment before Tina's eyes came into a very quick lock with his. "Leta," he said, this time with more ease, still difficult, nevertheless. "Leta and I were no longer close; she was engaged to my brother. Queenie's your sister," Newt said, his voice cutting at the reminder of Tina's grieving. "Jacob's lover- where does that leave me?"

"No Newt, you're entitled to as much sorrow as us. Leta was your friend. Jacob and Queenie are- it must be difficult to see them like this.." Tina smiled sympathetically. "Newt?" Her voice remained angelic, stricking the wizard through the heart. He looked at her calmly for a single moment. "Give me your hand." The shy man, with hestation, put one of his palms on the small, circular wood table. Tina looked down, his fingers were curling on themselves, timid for what could possibly be to come. She reached over the table, catching his hand in hers gently. An immense cluster of crimson danced and sung across their cheekbones. Tina had underestimated the intensity of Newt's hand. "What if we never find her, m-my sister?"

"T-Ti--," he tried to say her name, but it seemed all too hard. "Don't worry." Newt smiled very faintly, trying to show love in the best way he could. Her fingers suddenly interlaced his. Thump. Thump. Thump. His heart could not take it. He thought back on what he just said, "I meant don't worry, because we'll find her." He felt stupid for not clarifying.

"I knew what you meant," she grinned, fully aware of everything the man in front her thought. She squeezed his hand, stirring her emotions even more. Their clasp was endless in one way or another. It had forever shifted them. Newt applied more pressure as well, feeling his whole body tingle. He was having even more trouble than usual remaining steady both physically and mentally.

"T-Tina?" His voice was shaky, uncertain of its next move. "How do you always know exactly what I mean?" He regretted the words instantly as they came out of his parted lips.

"B-Because I know you, Newt Scamander." The wizard could feel everything in him burn with feorcity he had never felt. Something in him, so foreign, yet so wanting of Tina. He was afraid, a lot more than he ever had been. "Even when you're talking about salamanders," Tina admitted. Newt's head jerked up suddenly. His whole being trembling, especially his fingertips. He tried to study her carefully, like one of those animals he loved so dearly, and, in some way, she was more fascinating to him, even more endearing. His heart became so heavy.

"We don't have to discuss this after everything that has happened since then." Newt looked away, seeming ashamed, but Tina shook her head. She was not going to give this up so easily.

"To let you know Newt, that moment, it was the best moment I've had in a long time." Her voice was so true. The wizard ducked his head down again. All of this, the contact between eyes, between hands, between words, between hearts, he could not handle it.

"Jacob told me I shouldn't talk about salamanders," he admited guiltily, this time feeling actually, wholeheartedly ashamed of himself.

"It was so pure, so true. It was the most wonderful compliment I've ever recieved," Tina whispered softly, tightening her grip. Their breaths were both lacking.

"I should never have compared you to a lizard." He remembered Jacob's words. He knew what he did was wrong, but Tina's fingers were so peaceful and caring on his. They were everything he had always needed but never knew he did.

"Listen to me, Newton." His eyes darted up so quickly. It had been years since he had heard his full name. "There's nothing in the world more true than you with your creatures. You couldn't have possibly shown me a stronger demonstration of your feelings, Newt Scamander, the Magizoologist." Tina admitted. Newt looked up at her, this time doing something he was far too fearful to do, something so out of his comfort zone he was not sure he would succeed. He looked straight into Tina's eyes. He needed her to know his truth. Her salamander eyes burned his light ones, both their sparkles bouncing of each other like the moon on the ocean. He wanted to let go. His heart was too fast. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

"B-But T-Tina, you're not a creature," Newt had to let her know that. He did not want her to feel belittled. He wanted her to understand just how much she meant to him.

"Newt, I know." Tina had understood him again, every part of him- the parts nobody ever truly could.

"T-Tina--" He would have to find a way to force these words from his lips. "I-I don't want to loose you like Theseus lost Leta- or Jacob lost Queenie." It had been an even more true message. Tina's eyes were now glowing will all their might. She slid her chair closer, each glide making Newt's already limp body more unsteady, his breaths more uneven, and his heart louder. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.

When she was finally close enough to almost touch knees, she slowly grasped Newt's other hand. His face was still looking down at his shoes. The intensity of both of her hands wrapped with his, it was defining; it was lunacy. It felt like the first time he had ever found Pickett but better or the first time he had seen or flown a hippogriff. The air in his face, wisping through his hair, the feeling of freedom.

Tina let go of his right hand, placing one fingertip under his chin, lifting his visage to hers. His eyes, they let themselves swim into hers, they had been dying to for so long. His barriers were caved in. Newt was no longer the shell of a man he so often was. He could feel his throat become dry, and his breaths catch more than they ever had. T-Tina she was so close, a hand grasped in his, a finger upon his face. The American witch let go of the British wizard's left hand and placed it on his cheekbone. She could feel everything in him quiver, but her hands were also shaking all the same.

"N-Newt," she uttered, her breath half what it was used to being. There was fear and love and a courage growing in her, flowing through her blood. It would be enough for the both of them. "N-Newt," she repeated. His eyes, oh his eyes, were those of a child. He had been hurt, broken, but there was a softness that remained in them, something Tina knew she probably would only have the chance to see. Newt only wanted to hear his name from her again. It had been more real than all of his years had ever given him.

Tina slowly leaned forward, so scared but too wanting to stop herself. The Hufflepuff stayed stiff. He did not move. She got closer and closer, until the space between them was eyelashes of a distance. "N-Newt," she repeated again, love coating his name. He let go of his stiffness and moved his face ever so slightly, following her rhythm, but she was the last to close the distance. Their lips brushed, colliding in each other's everlasting comfort. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump. They parted after a single moment. Newt had a tear stream down his face as Tina caught it. "Please, don't leave me, too..."

Her dark, dark eyes were the next to let go of their pain. "I won't, if you promise me the same." Her tears flooded. Newt's heart was breaking madly at her dolor.

"I-I promise," he said, finding the bravery that was within the flame Tina had created inside his soul, he leaned in. Their foreheads touched. Their breaths mingled as the second contact was created. Newt slowly pressed his plump lips to her just-kissed ones. She tasted pure and sweet, but their was sadness in her touch, sadness in the shadows of their embrace. Tina was scared he too would disappear, somehow, someway, and Newt found himself too frightened to open his eyes, worried she would be but a ghost when he let go. He kissed her long and soft, never straying from her lips. He would never leave... America, London, Paris, wherever she was he would follow.

"F-From now on, i-it's together or not at all." Newt whispered through a tender kiss, attaching himself to his twin soul once more. He was not sure how he would find the courage after this moment, but, for now, he would enjoy every little parcel of it- more freedom than a hippogriff soaring over the Hogwarts Black Lake.

"I will never leave, Newt, wherever we may go," Tina smiled, a deep love rooted in her heart, their roots intertwined forevermore.


End file.
